“I’m Too Hungover For This”: Plated Review #2 Peanut Noodles

I don’t think Peanut Noodles was the real name for this recipe but… Honestly I’m too exhausted from making this meal to go check.

Oh holy shit it is called peanut noodles

For the record, I was hungover making this but the true reason I could barely cook this was because I have literally been some level of hungover this whole week. I didn’t even drink that much last night (relative to, you know, the previous days of the week) but I think my body is just done, overall. Also, before you judgey mcjudgersons judge me know that this week included my 9 year anniversary with Michael, marching in a Mardi gras parade in the pouring rain (alocohol is a natural internal heat packet), AND parent teacher conferences. If I hadn’t gotten drunk every night… Well I’d be in better shape BUT AT WHAT COST?

So anyway.

Peanut butter, miso paste, spring onions that you should ignore because they’re for the wrong recipe i just have shit reading comprehension (shit reading comprehension is the theme of this post), that flat kind of pasta thats lin something, agave, soy sauce, red wine vingear, something called mirin?!?, a super small amount of ginger, seasime seeds, eggplant and bok choy

So at first I was impressed that the eggplant and bok choy weren’t individually plastic wrapped as well as being in a plastic bag BUT once I arranged all the ingredients for this photo I realized that Plated really uses a bonkers amount of packaging. I don’t understand how meal subscription boxes can claim to reduce food waste. I know they mean that less PRODUCE is wasted but is an abundance of organic food waste really the problem in our landfills? I’m no trash expert (joke about how I’m trash, just not an expert) but aren’t we more worried about… Plastic bags never biodegrading?!?! BUT I DIGRESS

I really do think that Plated gives simple directions but I honest to Cho had to reread step 1 like ten times before it made even a little bit of sense. Chopping the produce was no big, but WTF that ginger paste thing is bullshit. Why didn’t they just send ginger paste? Making it by hand was ridiculous, I gave up after a solid 5 minutes of smooshing salt and ginger bits with a knife. I was supposed to smoosh until it was a “paste” like consistency… Which, a) what the fuck does that mean, really and b) didn’t look like it was ever gonna happen by just knife smoosh. The directions said there was a hint on how to do this under recipe tips but the tips were like “make sure you cut up the ginger” UM THANK YOU I had figured that out. (It also creepily said “read through the whole recipe before you began, trust us, you’ll be glad you did!” Which made me feel like at the end of this recipe it was going to be revealed to be some sort of joke, or like maybe it would say in step 6 “HA you thought to had to make ginger paste by hand, what horse shit, check the bok choy, the paste baggie is hidden in the leaves” [that didn’t happen])

Bok choy rose!! 🌹🌹🌹

Despite my complaining, this pasta was delicious. Michael and I agreed that were we rich people who could actually pay for meal boxes, we’d pick Plated. Thanks for this box, Madame V!!

Even though cooking through this hangover almost made me explode, I give it 10 Tippys out of 10, as well as 1 beer which symbolizes how I’ve learned nothing and am gonna crack open a beer as soon as I post this. FUCKING CHEERS, MY LIVER

🐒🐒🐒🐒🐒🐒🐒🐒🐒🐒🍺

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